On the way home, Kev asked me, "Are you sure this is what you want?"
I know I said "Yes", but the truth was, I wasn't at all sure ... if anything, it was exactly what I didn't want.
Somehow I didn't feel able to admit that.
Hindsight.... the reality was, I'd finished with him. If this situation was what I'd wanted, I'd have mentioned it.
I hadn't.
Instead I felt guilty, responsible, burdened, flattered and scared.
I didn't want to feel like that.
I couldn't understand why Kev had taken this step.
This was a mess and somehow I was holding a broom and expected to sweep up.
