Who and what Creates Bullies & Cowards...

.
.
.
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People 

Who can't cope with their Envy and/or Rejection

And of course, make the 

CHOICE




Sadly, in all walks of life you'll encounter both bullies and cowards, and with each there's a common shared theme because, ...usually ...these flaws are combined within the same personality.



Bullies aren't brave, they're cowards.

Any idiot knows that


By bullying, the individual, in part, reveals their underlying issues with these traits. Demonstrating, by choice, their insecurities, lack of personality, any genuine respect, along with their deep seated and significant inadequacies :- lack of social skills, wit and talent.




Like the smallest kid in school, who sets out to prove themself by provoking or insisting on a fight with the biggest. Cowards & Bullies need any kind of validation they can get, as they're generally totally inept.

I.E: by default they're generally ugly, dull, stupid, and have nothing whatsoever of interest to offer.

They're miserable

And this can be readily understood (given the pre-conditions)

The best that they can hope to achieve throughout their life, is to unload their misery onto those they recognise as having the skills, talent, life and any 'things they lack and can never acquire.

In order to attract attention and gain kudos they'll stoop to wild lies of accusation, for character assassination and during the process cry like babies if anyone criticises them, often accusing their victim of the very thing they themselves are guilty of.

The strength they imagine they have is in numbers, because cowards frequently support each other.

They need to.

Few around them are friends, they're just scared and want to avoid being the next victim.

The insults they cast at others are generally the things which are most true about them and not their target.



Now, that's bad if they're 5 or 6 years old, but when their age is in double figures... that's really sad.



I've encountered bullies in their 30s, 40s and 50s...

What does that prove?

Well... they grow old, they don't grow up and they never learn to take responsibility.



How far do we need to look to find the source of the problem for young bullies today?

I'm guessing....

Not far...

As a problem this one has been ongoing and is cyclic in all terms.

One begets another.

It won't change unless a bully is clever enough to take on board the comments of their critics and seriously consider them and what it reveals about their behaviour.

But ... therein lies the problem, these people lack the ability to recognise the truth. Even if they did, they'd deny it.

Deny it


What does it tell you about the character of any 30 - 50 year old who's guilty of that?

What does it say about any group of people in that age group whose enjoyment is based on their self congratulation and self professed success regarding attempts to publically humiliate or ridicule another.

 and for what... defence against these group attacks?

It's not hard to spot a bully... they're the empty vessels making most sound...

Creating a hostile environment in the places where the majority just want to enjoy the pleasure of the company of others.

They're the liars who hide behind lies and project their personal 'issues' onto others.

They'll ridicule, for 'fun'

Because that's what they're most Used to themselves.




"Pass it forward"   was a great film, but bullying and hatred (although featured) was never what it was intended to be about.


Bullies are people who can't be better and dislike themselves as a result.

They seethe with their perceived injustice when regarding those who they recognise are better, more able, talented etc.

They spit, shout and attempt to batter those, with what they lack, in any way they can.



In so many ways my ideas and views of the world have changed.

When I was a child, Nursing was more than just a profession or source of income, it was a Vocation. It attracted people who we respected, because they Genuinely cared for their patients.

Today I see so called 'Nurses' in training and already in positions involving 'caring' for the elderly and infirm, proclaiming publically how much they enjoy abusing others and making statements which involve 'Fisting' and describing people as "Thick old shit". Also stating:

" Mac ask Bumdand if you can have a lick of his anus."

and "Mac, pull Bumdand cock over your head......like a ........well, like a cock"

and describing others in this way,

"ahhh look at old Rancid Hag with her plastic tits and plastic face"

and who suggests to ranchers, "stick to fisting the steers"


I'm glad I have no elderly or infirm relatives in Scotland.

I don't need to worry about them ever being 'cared for' by THAT Nurse.

Or how about..

Others claiming to be employed in Higher Education, specifically the University of Wales, Newport. Who make public comments like:

" mac, rimming with Byd.....    harder, faster, longer....  good boys"

and "the word is fanny, you freaky erectile problem man"

or "shove your nose into byds anus, mac"


Both of them claim to be female and over the age of 35.

One (it seems) is also a Mother -  and training to be a Nurse



However, don't take my word for it, see for yourself, they're regularly regurgitating this kind of commentary online on AOL in a public chatroom called "Life Begins At 40"

Perhaps you could try this link:

Click here: Life Begins at 40 UK

In addition



Extract from Wikipedia



RE: Nonce / Nonse

"Etymology

With regard to the word's origin, there is evidence for a possible connection with nancy, a derogatory term referring to effeminate or homosexual males, and with a dialectical use of "nonse" to refer to a worthless person.^[2] The Oxford English Dictionary, while describing the word's etymology as "Origin unknown", tends to support these ideas, stating that the word is "perhaps related to" nance and cites a quotation which claims the word was derived from nancy-boy, or "perhaps compare English regional nonse good-for-nothing fellow".^[4]


In recent years the slang term nonce has come into more widespread use in the UK. Although the term nonce traditionally refers to sex offenders, it is also sometimes used as a general term of abuse, typically with "idiot" as its intended meaning.^{[6] [7]}
This is not to be confused with the other meaning of "nonce" as in Nonce word.

[edit] References

1. ^ "Introduction to Prisons". http://evilcity.wikispaces.com/Introduction+to+Prisons. 
2. ^ ^{a b c} "LISTSERV Discussion of origins of 'nonce'". http://listserv.linguistlist.org/cgi-bin/wa?A2=ind0506a&L=ads-l&D=0&P=6698. 
3. ^ "'Nonce' on Everything2". http://everything2.com/index.pl?node_id=287124. 
4. ^ Oxford English Dictionary Online, s.v. nonce, n.².
5. ^ "Les Nonces Apostoliques a Damas et Soufanieh". http://www.soufanieh.com/position.nonces.htm. Retrieved 28 July 2009. 
6. ^ "London Slang". http://www.londonslang.com/db/n/. 
7. ^ "Peevish Slang Dictionary". http://www.peevish.co.uk/slang/n.htm.  "

 Suck  ..  er Click it and see    :)

Halloween to you.....

....All (H)allows Eve to me.....




So what's the difference?

Well, let me explain my version and you figure out how that's different from yourself.



All Hallows Eve is one evening in the calendar year

It's when I remember my loved ones who have died along with all my family ancestors ........

................................................    with                   Respect.


It's also the one evening in the year when I can dress in traditional costume, and be complimented, ...

Long flowing dress and peaked hat.

Some say that it's when the veil of time is transparent and so it's associated wtih ghosts and of course...

Magyck

(however You spell it).


So what's Trick or Treat got to do with it?


Well...

Magyck isn't quite like you see in the movies... in my experience.

For example, I use a dyson to fly around my house - cleaning carpets
I do have a broom, Which I use....  for effect

Trick or Treat (for me) is a description of the results of Magyck.

In effect it's the realisation

You might also describe it as,

"What goes around comes around"

or

"You reap what you sow"

or

"You get what you deserve"

or

'sum words'

to that effect.

Where do you think those 'sayings' came from?

Don't forget

It's about CHOICE

(Who gave You that?)

Marriage ...a 21st Century Phenomena....

How things have changed....

When I was a child divorce was something I'd heard of but hadn't encountered. Parents in the 60's were married and stayed that way. Maybe your experience was different to mine, but that's how it seemed to me.

I went to Catholic schools where I learnt about guilt, sins, prejudice and intolerance. All these came under the umbrella of the one Holy Roman Apolistic Church. Some teachers made the experience of learning difficult for me particularly when I questioned specific points. Rather than answer, they frequently encouraged my peers to ridicule me for questioning.

For example:-

I remember one particular occasion when I was about 13 years old. I was then attending a Girls only High School for Catholics.

At the beginning of that academic year we'd been given a small booklet. I was told the 6th formers (during typing classes) had produced these for the school, and they were to form part of our Religious Education class.

Within the booklets were various topics and each was to be discussed, in turn, during the term.

I read through it and was particularly interested in discussing Euthanasia in view of the description provided via this booklet.



Eventually our Religious Education class turned to this page and the teacher read to us....

.... it went something like this....



' There are two sides to the debate over Euthanasia and both these arguments are provided below...

For Euthanasia...

"Well old and sick people are a drain on society. They have served their purpose. Euthanasia provides the obvious and easy solution to the problem. Allowing society to reduce the numbers of old and infirm individuals by reducing their burden on society. Once people have reached an age where they're no longer productive members by employment and ability, we should put them out of their misery and concentrate on youth."



Against Euthanasia....

"I think we should respect our elders. Even after they've finished making a useful contribution by employment they still have a place within society. They're wiser and have considerable experience in a range of matters which they can share with friends and family. Old age shouldn't be a reason to murder and Euthanasia is something we should never tolerate. As a christian I am opposed to it and glad that Medical Professionals are subject to the hypocratic oath which prevents them from murdering the elderly patients within their care. We should treat our Elders (older relatives) with due care and respect. They are not a burden, they're a blessing."


Following this was a summary of the legalities and the Catholic church's overview in relation to Euthanasia.

This largely amounted to ....' it's not allowed '.

My teacher asked if anyone in the class had a question.... my hand shot up. She looked away and asked the rest of the class again, "Is there Anyone Else with a question or comment to make regarding this subject?"

Only my hand in the air....

She started to ask individual students, "What about you Margaret?" who shook her head in response. She looked to another of her favourites, "Carmel, do you have any questions?" Carmel shook her head in response.

No help there... then...

The teacher started to walk around her desk saying, "In that case, let's look at the next subject...turn to..."

She was intending to ignore me?

"Miss?" I still had my hand up...

she gave a resigned sigh ... "Yes Barbara?"

.... at last!

"I thought we were going to be learning about Euthanasia today?"

She half laughed and said, "That's what we have just done!" looking around the class... who, in turn, smirked and tittered.

"It's not" I said, " you've read something to the class, that I'm reading here. It refers to Euthanasia but these so called 'arguments' actually have little or nothing to do with Euthanasia."

................................................................................................




If you can't do these at school....



Where can you question and learn?

When can you trust the information you're given?



................................................................................................






What I learnt from that class....




I was the only one who actually understood the subject.

Everyone else accepted, without question, the misinformation they were provided

Religion was/is an important subject, there are reasons why it's generally not specialist teachers who teach it.

There are hidden agendas within school environments, which undermine the process of educating children.

An Adult, with authority, can and often will encourage peer pressure/bullying for the sake of ego.


It's difficult to have any respect, trust and regard for Catholicism following this and similar experiences




Faith, Hope, Charity.... these things are lacking today and you're ridiculed if you have them.

We live in a huge glass house where people throw stones of various shapes and sizes all day. The only object, it seems, is to create as much damage and hurt as possible.

I listen to my children's ideas on faith and they've not learnt to be dismissive from me. This is Science at work along with the lack of examples elsewhere.

Scientific method explains that if a theory could be wrong but can't be proven to be wrong then it probably is true.

So, if Science can't prove God doesn't exist, even if it claims there is no such thing, by it's own method, God probably Does exist but isn't appreciated, respected or given credit.

And what IS God anyway?

Something that Science says doesn't exist but ... what is that?

What has 21st Century Science actually proven doesn't exist that could be God?

Does it matter if there's a God?

What matters if there is no God?

Who really decides?

Something strange...

happened when I was about 13 or 14 years of age...

My friend, Suzanne and I had decided to hold a seance. We'd been discussing the possibilities or potential of the supernatural for sometime and had come to the conclusion that harnessing some occult powers for good purposes was possible and probably an ideal solution for us.

I'd been pursuing information regarding this for sometime and had done some preparatory research and, as the time arranged approached, wasn't feeling as confident about the whole idea as I had been during initial discussions.

Suzanne's family lived almost opposite and they had a touring caravan parked in their front garden. Suzanne had the keys and with a collection of left over candles (including some from birthday cakes) we started to assemble a make-shift ouija board.

Once we had everything we could find and add to the 'atmosphere' (for us this also involved mars bars, crisps and our favourite fizzy drink: dandelion & burdock) we sat and looked at each other across the caravan's central table.

"Are you ready?" Suzanne asked me,

"I'm not sure we should be doing this Suzanne, what I've read suggests this is serious stuff" I replied

"Let's at least do the ouija board or we've done all this for nothing?!"

I took a breath in and agreed.



I don't really remember much about what happened immediately after.

I understood at that time that there can be effective minor muscle operations determining results and had been the requisite unconcious co-operation of clients providing innocent corroboration for fakes during the Victorian era.

I'd certainly discussed that with Suzanne. There were only the two of us to touch the glass base. The board surface was reasonably smooth and so the glass would move without hindrance, but I wanted Suzanne to be concious of the obvious effects if she did not clear her mind. In other words, I wanted to see if it worked without any concious or unconcious effect of ours influencing the result. Although I'm not sure that's really ever possible.

We also agreed that no result wouldn't change what we already believed to be possible.

We weren't sure what to ask initially. We didn't want to talk to anything like a demon, we just wanted to know if there was a spirit who could somehow confirm whether or not such a thing exists.

How do you ask a spirit if it exists?

We asked, "Is there anybody there who won't scare us?"

No answer, discussed, waited, repeated, same result x 2

We changed the question ....


"Is there anything here that could or would reply to us through this medium?"



As I finished saying it, I felt unease.

The caravan was small, but as I sat at the table, I glanced over my shoulder several times, searching the darkest corners for ... 'something'.

I felt a presence beside me, I kept looking because every sense was telling me that a man was stood just behind my left shoulder and staring intently at me. When I looked, there was nothing there, but every other sense was checking and confirming.

I even asked my friend Suzanne if she could feel or see anything. She looked puzzled and obviously had no idea what I meant. I wanted to get out of the caravan as soon as possible so made some excuses and hurried back around to my home.

All night I was concious of this presence. I kept telling myself it was just my imagination and to ignore it and it would go away.

When I woke the next morning, the presence was still there. It seemed to be so close it was almost touching me.

I didn't like the feeling at all.

For months the figure stayed close to my shoulder. It was during the winter months so, I stayed at home and read mostly after school, or watched some tv. At school I just tried to ignore it. I tried to avoid doing obvious things like leaving doors open or moving out of it's way when sitting down in class rooms.

Remember, I was only 13 or 14 years old.

I was critically assessing my physical and mental responses to something that no one else appeared to be aware of.

I felt vulnerable.

I didn't know what it was.

Ignoring it didn't make it go away.

I didn't like it.

I wanted it to stop.

Apart from asking a few questions at the seance, I never mentioned it to anyone for years. I was just aware of it. As time passed, it seemed to take a back step. It never spoke.

I stopped being scared of it, accepted it was there and was probably a permanent feature, whether I liked it or not. It has (like most men's hairline) receeded. 

I'm not sure if it's gone or that I'm so used to it now that I don't notice it, if that makes sense.

Sew many times...

I thought, ".... the only option here is to make do with what is available, or do it myself?."

At the age of 19 - I was a joint home/mortgage owner. (1983)

Married at 20 - ( August 1984 )


We moved from our 1st home in Fazakerley and into our Formby home in November 1986. I discovered I was pregnant the following December (87) and J was born September (1988) when I was 24 years old.



So I bought a second hand sewing machine and learnt how to sew and made dresses for J and myself. I didn't want to dress my baby girl like a teenager (although I was looking forward to that eventually). I wanted full skirted old fashioned styled "Girlie-girl" dresses. They weren't in any of the shops I visited. I couldn't find the woollens I wanted either, so I started to crochet cardigans.

When she was approaching one, J was beginning to toddle around and I made her first woollen camel coat, with a beret. Her 2nd coat was similar in that it too was woollen but double breasted with brass button details were included in this red coat.

I became pregnant with K shortly after J's 1st birthday. By now J's blonde hair almost reached her shoulders, just the curls at the ends lifted it away. (J always twiddled with her hair while drinking or pondering).

Hindsight...

When I had news confirming my first pregnancy, I was exhilirated. There was no doubt in anyone's minds at the time, I believe everyone realised, it was a miracle. My husband was paraplegic and had been told at the age of 16, by a consultant, that he'd never have children of his own.

We'd been 'trying' for sometime. There were lots of reasons why I knew it was difficult and we arranged to see some professionals. Through this it had been established that my husband probably could be a father. They scheduled a histogram for me in January 1988. (This was now December 1987).

Looking back, I realise now what I hadn't at the time. Although I'd been researching early symptoms of pregnancy and knew (I thought) all about them.

One weekend before Christmas 87, my husband went to spend with a friend he'd been to school with. I stayed home as I wasn't feeling too well.

I remember getting comfortable on the sofa and enjoying watching my selection of tv programmes or films etc. I was very thirsty and had recently bought a larger Tea Pot. I seemed to be constantly running to the kettle to refill it and it became noticeable while I was trying to watch a film, which I think was called "Supergirl".

I think they were playing a number of Superman films or similar that weekend.


(Back in 1982/3) I remember going to the cinema with the children's father while we were 'courting'. I laughed so much at one scene, it was embarrassing.


It's the scene in Lex Luther's underground palace, his friend/employee is tidying up the bed and... at one point gasps and recoils in horror....


I laughed so  much my ribs ached, tears were streaming down my face, it was That funny.


Unfortunately this also attracted a lot of attention from the rest of the cinema audience who were hoping to hear the film dialogue again soon. (I suspect I've a loud laughter)

It never occurred to me that I might be pregnant as it was too early to consider that, my period was late until some weeks later.

I was so pleased phoning the Royal Liverpool Hospital to wish them a Very Happy New Year and explain why I was cancelling my appointment for the Histogram. The Nurse congratulated me and promised she'd pass my thanks to the consultant who'd been assisting myself and my husband :- Dr. Evans (Female, Consultant Urologist).

I was so keen to be a mother, although I had every reason to believe that I wasn't pregnant, I'd been regularly buying pregnancy kits and checking, just in case.

One had suggested a positive result, it had been a test tube based result, a postive result involved a completed circle around the edge, which mine had.

The children's father disputed the result and insisted on another and that it involved our local GP, to ensure accuracy.

I arranged this with my GP and explained my husbands point of view, my GP had wanted to arrange my first ante-natal visit and thought that this further test was unnecessary and less reliable than the one I'd already done. However, he agreed to provide the test and explained the results would take a few days to come back to him. I agreed to provide a sample of urine that day in an appropriately sterile pot. I waited impatiently.

Some days later, working overtime in a flourescent lit open office with hardly anyone else working late. I rang my GP for the results of the pregnancy test.

The Office was silent as I waited with baited breath for my GP to break the news to me.

I rang my husband

I jumped up and juggled with my handbag and coat which seemed to have a life of their own suddenly...

From a darkened desk my friend and colleague Angela Carlin (Angie) approached me saying softly and with tears in her eyes, "Congratulations" her hands pressed together while I said, "Oh Angie, We're pregnant", she said, "I know, I heard you say and I think that's the loveliest way to think about it too"

Labyrinths...

Of the mind....

I was introduced to various video games after the births of my children.

Sega's Megadrive was the first console that our family had and of course I set about the business of completing all the games that I enjoyed. These included:

Sonic and Tales

Shinobi (which I thought I'd completed because I reached the labyrinth at the level I  completed but found no way out to allow the credits or find my way through to another level - if anyone accomplished more, I'd like to hear about how and what it involved because I  dislike not knowing)

Streets of Rage was great fun.

Never really got into Golden Axe - more for blokes I thought.

Then of course the Play Station arrived, in those days you could rent it from a Video shop. They were too expensive to buy at the time.

Eventually, Christmas 1998, a playstation came to live in our house. Although, I hadn't been able to resist testing it worked a few times, part of the package was the game Tomb Raider III.

I'd also bought the official memory card and it took me months of frustration (re-playing from the beginning) to figure out that my memory card had severe memory lapses.

My Son (K) was also a frequent PS player, he was playing some football game at the time and we were each convinced the other was responsible for the memory loss of each of our games (we only had the one memory card).

I loved that game, the whole concept, even the name Lara and Croft Manor. Just the anticipation of playing it ... anyway, it took me 7 months to complete from start to finish (although I had to replay from the beginning more times than I ever considered). I bought the first of the series, the original. Completed in 1 week, which surprised me. I then bought TRII and completed that in less than 2 days. I considered the different in game save methods and concluded it was probably due to that and TRIII had obviously considered their established fan base in their 'crystal' saves - by introduction.

I then waited for the next in the series. Considered the release dates of the 3 previous, it seemed likely to me to be released just in time for Christmas, which also meant I could give it to myself as a gift. It was while shopping in October in Southport (Woolworths) that I walked past the stand displaying the top 40 games. Something caught my eye - Had that mentioned Tomb Raider?.

I turned back and walked over

I stopped and stared at the shelf before me...

"Was I imagining this, or was that the latest game of Tomb Raider?"

I decided it must be a promotional thing, you know.... order now get it later type of thing.

I approached the display....

Picked up and turned over the box, "Where was the information saying you can't have this yet?" - couldn't find it.

I started to consider the possibility that this game was actually available now, and I could buy it.... and go home and play.

I wanted this game so much, it was with some trepidation and disbelief that I approached the counter to pay. I passed my empty box to the cashier and explained to him, "I don't suppose you've actually got this game in stock yet?"

"Oh Yes," he said,

"Really?" "Because, it's not due out for another month at least, I've been keeping up to date with the news of it's release"

He looked a bit surprised and began to reconsider before saying, "I'll check!"

Anyway, much to my surprise, I hurried out of their Southport Store to dash home with my treasure.

I even felt embarrassed a few times, as my 18th month old (approx) son spent all of his waking hours with me and would often watch with interest as I played Tomb Raider (asking questions and discussing options/tactics and historical details etc). He'd point and call out, "Mummm.... there's Lara!" while we were out shopping and of course, people would look at me. Other 18 month old kids might notice McDonalds, whereas mine was identifying minor details and associating them with me.

I did worry about how people would perceive me as a Mother. It often occurred to me that, while I was out shopping in the local village of Formby, people might think I'm a child minder as each one of my children is blonde, whereas (I'm told) I was born with dark hair. (Ash Brown - A Hairdresser in Bootle told me).

I'm old enough to stop putting dyes on my hair, I don't mind becoming grey.

It might seem odd but I often think of Samson when I think about my hair. It struck me as odd that his powers could be affected by the length of his, and given that historically professed fact, why the men at the time all preferred to have their hair in "Short back and sides" style. It seemed a contradiction to me.

I've always longed for someone to share these observations with. Someone who could explain things to me, from their perspective, in a way that I respect. I don't think that's unreasonable, but then, I'm a hopeful romantic and I prefer to be.

I look back over the stories that have interested me, they've ranged from songs in Nursery Rhymes to hidden codes of antiquity. In the strangest way, I can honestly say, that something like that happened to me.

My life could be a musical, a fairy story, a mystery. It all depends on how you see it. A Film, a Play, a Book, well... maybe.

Does it seem weird if I admit now that I created some little coded comments for my amusement as a child?

Strange, but nevertheless true.

Sometimes it would come back immediately, sometimes it might take a lot longer (weeks/months) that I noticed. I thought of it when someone explained how boomerangs work. So saw the results as being a lot like that.

I'd say something and add a gesture, or something and then watch and wait to see. If I asked a question, I'd find more or less the same answer coming back. Only.... occasionally it would be different and it's when I noticed that .... I became more interested.

I started to reply in specific but odd ways, usually asking for clarification (checking I wasn't imagining it). I didn't know who was changing the answers, I just knew that they'd respond and that it could be anyone who gives their reply.

I read a lot when I was a child. Even during mealtimes in fact, I couldn't settle down to a meal unless I had a book with me. Somehow I didn't enjoy the food without a book.

Books were my friends.

From fairytales, fact, history, fables, love stories and languages (all sorts, including licquorice)

If I've learnt anything, it's that the truth invariably comes out and it's worth it. Fear isn't a bad thing, responding inappropriately is.

Fear is a moment when we're feeling exhilirated, something new is about to happen, when there's nothing to hurt us, we call it excitement, thrilling.

So, why is there the expression:

"Fight or Flight"

Hm?

And oddly, what has that got to do with my favourite comic character and .... why does that bother me?

Encouraging.... Great Moments...

I remember lots of things but what I'm thinking of now are those moments when I had positive feedback from my children. Without prompt.

At the age of 3 months, my daughter (J), fastened securely to me in a papoose like wrap around - leant back.

I was negotiating my way across a very busy road in Southport, where I've always loved to shop. I looked down, just to check she was okay, and looked up again to check the traffic, but couldn't resist looking back at my daughters face.

Big eyes, sparkling, cheeks so plump and rosie you could bite, the biggest beaming gum almost filled smile. She was Gorgeous, she still is.

She didn't look away, I kept feeling my attention dragged away to check the road again. I'd look back, expecting to see her nestling against me, but no.... there it was still... that Huge Smile!!

I grinned back too, her smile actually got bigger.

It must have been mere moments, but that smile filled years of my life and continues to do so. Memories are important, that's one I treasure.

My Son (K), my eldest son, while watching my favourite film (Superman) with me said, "Why are they doing that?" ... he was sat on my lap, he'd been becoming increasingly concerned with the storyline - this is when they're all still on Krypton - and had wanted a cuddle while we watched.

I explained, "Welllll..... the planet is about to explode, they can't save that. However, Superman's Mum & Dad have found a way to save their baby, which means sending him away... somewhere he'll be safe and can grow up and maybe have children of his own one day".

My Son asked, "Why can't he stay with his Mum & Dad?" so I told him, "They're not allowed to leave and if he stays with them he'll die too. So, because they can't all go, you see, and his Mum & Dad love him too much to want him to die with them, they're sending him somewhere he'll be safe."

My Son (K) cried.

I think he was 3 or maybe 4 years old at that time.


Tears for good reasons, all genuine emotions on display. Lovely!


My Son (D) he's very like me. He very quietly goes about doing things. He questions and looks for evidence. I've always enjoyed attending parental things for him. For the ego stroking. Teachers would gush over how well behaved, and successful a pupil he had/was being. Voted by his last year at school as the "Koolest Kid" and with a lion's mane of curls he enjoys.

My Son (P) is so like my eldest they're almost identical. The only difference being that they're different gender and separated by a number of years <quick math check> 8 years, almost exactly. He's almost like a bit of each of his siblings. I think that they've all influenced him. He's a Very intelligently articulate young man, who's totally unaware of how brilliant he is and so seems nonchalant. He recognises other people's abilities (apart from his Mothers - typically).

Like J, P is very sociable and caring although he'll not tolerate abuse or idiots. Like K, he's sporty and an excellent competitor (praises others and becomes more determined to win and do better himself). He's like D in being caringly considerate and intelligently good humoured. Still, he is an individual with his own points of view and is prepared to defend them but not without considering all other points of view without bias.

I've observed all of these skills being practised by my children, often at my own expense, but it was worth that small sacrifice to see them prove to themselves (against the one person who's opinion they value most in terms of being fair and honest) that they're right.

Or, if they're not..... that the gauntlet (DARE) has been picked up by the one person they trust most, Their Mother.

So in effect, what happened?

They took responsibility.

(with some negotiation and background appreciation)

I gave it.

They took it.

This establishes further conditions, in terms of how effective the route/action taken was and in determining the next choice and options available. Construct is then a perceivable option and due consideration needs to be applied. As a Mother, my success is determined by this selection. So far, 100% success rate.

Nursery - Days Happy

Ask most people, "If you could have anything, what would you want and what would you do if you got it?" and the answer they'll most likely give is along the lines of, "Have lots of money in the bank".

That's it.

If I had lots of money in the bank, I know what I would do with it.

I'd buy a home, a big one.

I'd like it to be a place I could share as a school, if parents wanted me to teach their children in a homely and encouraging atmosphere.

Somewhere private, not too isolated. Kids need to explore and not be too frightened. They need to learn about other people and about places they may want to visit.

Easy access to cultural places and transportation.

Sufficient funds to provide this and cover the expenses which would include trips and outings, transport, et al plus room and board.

I'd love to be able to provide a large area of land for the pleasure of dog owners, somewhere carefully designed with them in mind. Lots of interactive play areas to keep the pets exercised physically and cerebrally. They're far more intelligent than we often give them credit for and I'm sure they must be bored.

The British are known for being lovers of animals, we've set standards and constantly interrogated them for means of improvement throughout our history. It may seem eccenctric, but I'm sure any animal lover would appreciate what kind of reaction it would have on a dog.

Cats take themselves off for adventures independently, whereas a dog is limited by their circumstances and owners, not to mention the dangers of neighbourhoods nowadays. I'd be bored if I was a dog, wouldn't anyone?

I love children, if I could have more myself, I would. However, I'm 47 and incredibly fortunate in having given birth to 4 healthy and happy children.

I'm told I'm menopausal, in fact, I've passed that point - having not had a period for approximately 18 months. I'm not in a relationship, one fallopian tube and ovary were removed during the early stages of my last pregnancy - with my 4th child (Ovarian Cyst - overactive corpus luteum about the size of a baby's head, but bigger). All these were removed at approximately the 13th (or so) week of gestation. I have now a scar that looks like I've had a C.Section. rather than the bikini line scarring the surgeon had suggested and promised.

Plus, I'm single.

I don't go out on dates because there's no one I've met who I want to go out with who's also single. I don't like cheats or liars. There seems to be a lot of single minded men out there too.

I don't travel to places at the drop of a hat, not because I don't want to, but because I have other things I want and need to do too .... these take priority.

I love being at home, I've had a fair bit of practice when it comes to keeping myself occupied. I like to share knowledge, engage young minds and see where their thoughts take them travelling.

I get excited  discussing things that I love, like English... it's language and heritage and modesty (of course).

I think the best way to teach children is to discuss things, get them interested and then ... with support... assist them in the next step of learning for them and actively develop their own critical self assessment skills.

Learning should be a life long accomplishment and each individual has been equipped to allow it, a school that I lead would recognise as each aspect was considered and how to assist in implementing it to constructive beneficial fruition.

The best environment for a child who's learning is a place where they feel they're at home. I still think they should be allowed to negotiate what that includes because as they become part of it, the space they share should have elements that are requisite to their happiness. Open honest exchange of information is vital for these to be in place or prepared for implementation.

All students would be positively encouraged to be honest.

I've always had a long winded rule that I remind my children of occasionally, this:

"Don't lie to me, I'll know or I'll find out. And, telling me the truth is not the worst thing that could happen. Telling me a truth that involves you doing something bad might involve me being annoyed and telling you off, maybe even shouting. But, I would be pleased that you were honest and brave in telling me about it.

If you come to me first and tell me about it, it's unlikely you'll be punished, though you maybe given a series of tasks to do in order to resolve the issue. So it's better to  come straight to me and explain what's happened straight away, that we can see what's the best way to sort it out. It may not even be a problem. Everyone makes mistakes or feels guilty when perhaps they don't need to.

However, the worst thing that could happen is; that you do something bad and then lie to me about it."

The best environment for young minds should provide an open and encouraging supportive application of what's valued by establishing a place where honesty is consistently proven, accepted and rewarded. This would initiate the recognition and chain of respect and how it's mutualality is affected and implemented from the start.

Children will test this, that's natural. It's an invaluable learning process for all involved. Identifies each individuals current perspective and highlights aspects of development to be prioritised.

I'd get rid of schedules, I'd prefer to maximise every opportunity.

Like Socrates, Aristotle, ... I'd teach practically.

Children should play, play is the most important means of learning and practice for a child to assess their performance and realise any weakness that needs additional work to improve.

Assessment shouldn't get in the way, observation and regular conversation should be sufficient with rigorous analysis for reviews.

I'd like to teach the children who want to use their knowledge rather than have a pretty certificate that's forgotten in a draw or is a dust collecting object on a wall they prefer not to look at generally. (just put it somewhere Else)

I think each child should set their own learning pace, I'd give them that opportunity and share in it.
Having a place for myself and my children that I could call  home, somewhere they all feel safe, where I  am there for them and still able to do things like writing and painting, and able to afford to do it all, That would be my reward.

Then I could help other people, I'd invest all surplus monies in schemes involving people like myself. People who want a better life, are thrilled and happy about the work it involves and know what should be included and why - it's important.

I'd help them first.