Hindsight...

When I had news confirming my first pregnancy, I was exhilirated. There was no doubt in anyone's minds at the time, I believe everyone realised, it was a miracle. My husband was paraplegic and had been told at the age of 16, by a consultant, that he'd never have children of his own.

We'd been 'trying' for sometime. There were lots of reasons why I knew it was difficult and we arranged to see some professionals. Through this it had been established that my husband probably could be a father. They scheduled a histogram for me in January 1988. (This was now December 1987).

Looking back, I realise now what I hadn't at the time. Although I'd been researching early symptoms of pregnancy and knew (I thought) all about them.

One weekend before Christmas 87, my husband went to spend with a friend he'd been to school with. I stayed home as I wasn't feeling too well.

I remember getting comfortable on the sofa and enjoying watching my selection of tv programmes or films etc. I was very thirsty and had recently bought a larger Tea Pot. I seemed to be constantly running to the kettle to refill it and it became noticeable while I was trying to watch a film, which I think was called "Supergirl".

I think they were playing a number of Superman films or similar that weekend.


(Back in 1982/3) I remember going to the cinema with the children's father while we were 'courting'. I laughed so much at one scene, it was embarrassing.


It's the scene in Lex Luther's underground palace, his friend/employee is tidying up the bed and... at one point gasps and recoils in horror....


I laughed so  much my ribs ached, tears were streaming down my face, it was That funny.


Unfortunately this also attracted a lot of attention from the rest of the cinema audience who were hoping to hear the film dialogue again soon. (I suspect I've a loud laughter)

It never occurred to me that I might be pregnant as it was too early to consider that, my period was late until some weeks later.

I was so pleased phoning the Royal Liverpool Hospital to wish them a Very Happy New Year and explain why I was cancelling my appointment for the Histogram. The Nurse congratulated me and promised she'd pass my thanks to the consultant who'd been assisting myself and my husband :- Dr. Evans (Female, Consultant Urologist).

I was so keen to be a mother, although I had every reason to believe that I wasn't pregnant, I'd been regularly buying pregnancy kits and checking, just in case.

One had suggested a positive result, it had been a test tube based result, a postive result involved a completed circle around the edge, which mine had.

The children's father disputed the result and insisted on another and that it involved our local GP, to ensure accuracy.

I arranged this with my GP and explained my husbands point of view, my GP had wanted to arrange my first ante-natal visit and thought that this further test was unnecessary and less reliable than the one I'd already done. However, he agreed to provide the test and explained the results would take a few days to come back to him. I agreed to provide a sample of urine that day in an appropriately sterile pot. I waited impatiently.

Some days later, working overtime in a flourescent lit open office with hardly anyone else working late. I rang my GP for the results of the pregnancy test.

The Office was silent as I waited with baited breath for my GP to break the news to me.

I rang my husband

I jumped up and juggled with my handbag and coat which seemed to have a life of their own suddenly...

From a darkened desk my friend and colleague Angela Carlin (Angie) approached me saying softly and with tears in her eyes, "Congratulations" her hands pressed together while I said, "Oh Angie, We're pregnant", she said, "I know, I heard you say and I think that's the loveliest way to think about it too"